Aaron Miller

Aaron Miller

Provo, UT
Helping Practice

Helping Practice

Helping is a skill that improves over time

Here’s a thought about practice.

Who do you know that is especially good at helping others? I mean the person who seems to always know the right thing to say or do. Their timing is always uncanny and they have a special knack for seeing what’s really going on. Right now I’m thinking of a neighbor who fits this description.

I’ve become convinced that these expert helpers only get there one way: by practice. A desire and intention to help are part of it, for sure, but these experts also learn by experience. They’ve learned the kind of help that makes a difference. Practice enhances any skill, so of course that would be true for helping, too.

How can you become a better helper through practice? Maybe it’s by focusing on a kind of help that fits your gifts, like listening or creative problem-solving. You might practice noticing more to see how others around you could use a helping hand. You could learn more about a particular challenge that people face, like shyness or anxiety.

There’s also a comfort that comes with thinking of becoming a better helper through practice. It means we can all improve, no matter how useless we feel right now. Our failure to effectively help those we love doesn’t mean we’re failures; it just means we need more practice.

It’s become clear to me that help is a skill that improves with practice and time.


Things to Read

The Rise of Shareholder Politics

The idea that shareholders only want profits just isn’t true anymore. A nice explanation of how they expect more from the companies they own.

Against Car Supremacy

While we get enamored with electric cars in the US, much of the rest of the world is reducing their reliance on cars altogether. Micromobility is the future.

Tuskegee and the Health of Black Men

I’ve taught about the tragic Tuskegee syphilis experiment for years in my ethics class. Its impact is still seen today, decades later.


Impact Highlight

Agriculture is the primary occupation for the the world’s poorest, so improving the livelihood of farmers is especially high impact. This is true in Bhutan, as well.

Mountain Hazelnuts provides full-service support to Bhutanese farmers, helping them grow, harvest, process, and sell hazelnuts into international markets. As a for-profit venture, they’ve doubled the income of over 15,000 households and have employed over 1,000 people. They also use environmentally sustainable growing and processing practices.

Promotional Stuff

Who is your ethical hero?

One of mine is my co-author, Bill O’Rourke. He had a long and fruitful career at one of the largest aluminum manufacturers in the world, filling multiple executive roles like VP of environment, health and safety, head of procurement, CIO, and President of Alcoa Russia. Through all of it, he personally encountered just about every ethical dilemma you could imagine and consistently made the right choice.

In this week’s episode of the How to Help Podcast, Bill is going to coach us through one of the most common dilemmas that people face: you see something wrong and feel like you should intervene, but doing so is risky. Listen and learn from someone who is a fountain of good advice.

How to Help Podcast • Episode 8 • Intervention

Intervention • Bill O’Rourke • s01e08

Intervention • Bill O’Rourke • s01e08

Sometimes it’s hard to be the hero. According to research, this is one of the most common dilemmas that people face. Bill O’Rourke will guide us through what intervention looks like and how to stand up to those we work with and know. Notice the skills Bill uses, things like gathering the facts, seeking perspective from others, acting confidently, and setting the tone as a leader.

About Our Guest:

Bill O’Rourke spent the majority of his career at Alcoa, Inc. a global aluminum manufacturing company. After Bill retired from Alcoa he continued to serve on the Board of the Alcoa Foundation and teach values at Alcoa’s Executive Leadership Program. He joined Alcoa as a Patent Attorney in 1975 and held a number of leadership positions including Corporate Patent Counsel, Vice President of Global Business Services (Financial Services, HR Services, Aircraft Operations, etc.), Chief Information Officer, Vice President of Procurement, Corporate Auditor, and Assistant General Counsel. From 2005 to 2008 Bill was the President of Alcoa-Russia. Bill was the Vice President, Environment, Health & Safety, and Sustainability three times under three CEOs at Alcoa.

Bill lectures on Business Ethics, Corporate Compliance, and Safety at a number of companies and hospitals around the World, at Rotary Clubs, and at many universities including the University of Pittsburgh, Michigan, Nebraska, Arizona State, Florida, Illinois, Carnegie Mellon, Harvard Medical School, Northwestern, Chatham, San Jose, Viterbo, Benedictine, Marquette, Notre Dame, Gonzaga, Virginia Tech, the University of Dayton and Duquesne University.

Bill is a co-author of The Business Ethics Field Guide.

Useful Links:

The Business Ethics Field Guide

Power of Ethics Ethics: Creating an ethical organization in a hostile environment- Russia- Bill O’Rourke’s experiences

YouTube Seek True North: Stories on Leadership and Ethics-Bill O’Rourke

WSJ Story of the Alcoa Plant Manager

About Merit Leadership

To learn more about our products and services, visit http://meritleadership.com

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A Letter from a Billionaire

A Letter from a Billionaire

Warren Buffett's halfway there.

Warren Buffett—famous billionaire and cofounder of The Giving Pledge—released a new letter last week announcing that he is halfway to his promise of giving away 99% of his wealth before he dies. As is typically the case for him, Buffett used the moment to share his perspective on broader issues. While the entire letter is worth reading, I’ll highlight a few passages.


He emphasized how easy giving should be for the wealthy, a message he’ll undoubtedly promote for as long as he can.

The easiest deed in the world is to give away money that will never be of any real use to you or your family. The giving is painless and may well lead to a better life for both you and your children.

He also duly praised the stewards of our charitable contributions, along with every else who gives their more meager donations or more substantial time to help those around them. His humility here is apt. As rich as he is, if he gave all his wealth away at once it wouldn’t be more than a quarter of what Americans give altogether in a single year. All of our small donations add up.

Those who give their love and time in order to directly help others – perhaps adding a monetary gift that requires them to give up the purchase of something meaningful for their own use – are the heroes of philanthropy. America has millions of such givers.
These people receive no recognition whether they mentor the young, assist the elderly or devote precious hours to community betterment. They do not have buildings named after them, but they silently make those establishments – schools, hospitals, churches, libraries, whatever – work smoothly to benefit those who have received the short straws in life.

Last, I appreciate his optimism and how he recognizes the multiple institutions we need for a flourishing society.

I’m optimistic. Though naysayers abound – as they have throughout my life – America’s best days most certainly lie ahead. What’s happened here since 1776 has not been a historical fluke.

Philanthropy will continue to pair human talent with financial resources. So, too, will business and government. Each force has its particular strengths and weaknesses. Combined, they will make the world a better place – a much better place – for future generations.

Warren Buffett’s generosity will be rightly remembered as historic. And still, it won’t be enough. For as much good they’re positioned to do—a massive amount of good—the world’s billionaires can’t save us. Only we can do that.


Things to Read - Our World in Data Edition      

This week I want to feature some articles from Our World in Data. It's an incredible source of information and perspective on the world's most pressing issues.

Why is life expectancy in the US lower than in other rich countries?

Too many reasons, but also opportunities for change.

Technology Change and Exponential Progress

It boggles the mind when you consider how much faster and cheaper it is to do certain things.

Why do we need to know about progress in the world's large problems?

It matters how far we've come. Read the numbers.


Impact Highlight

Many of the barriers to the world's poor are found in the financial system itself. In wealthy nations, we take for granted banking, insurance, and other services that are hard to access or nonexistent for low-income people.

Grameen Foundation USA accelerates innovative approaches for access to financial services. Their programs span a wide range of financial issues for the poor, including targeted solutions for small farmers and women. They've been recognized by, among others, The Gates Foundation as a high-impact innovator in this space.

(Fun fact: While in law school, I spent a summer working as a legal intern at Grameen Foundation. It was a transformative experience for me.)

Promotional Stuff

Can you imagine what would happen if Warren Buffett was a social impact investor?

Warren Buffett clearly doesn't consider himself much of an expert on solving social problems, and I appreciate his humility. But what if he used his investments themselves, and not just his wealth, to do more good in the world?

My podcast guest this week, Geoff Woolley, is a pioneering impact investor and an expert in marrying capital markets with social good. He'll help you see that we have so many ways of changing old approaches for the better.

How to Help Podcast • Impact Investing • Geoff Wolley

How to Change for Good

How to Change for Good

Improvement that sticks

For the How to Help newsletter, I like using titles that have multiple meanings. It's true this week, too. Did you read this as "Change for Good" meaning permanently, or "Change for Good" meaning improvement? It's important to think about both.

Most of our efforts to help others are stuck in the short-term. We make a one-time donation. We listen to a friend who's weighed down. We drive someone to the airport. There's nothing wrong with these efforts. The short-term help matters. Momentary relief matters.

But change is a long-term thing. It takes a long time to stick. It needs persistent effort. And it means that we see farther down the road than just a few steps ahead.

To that end, I have another excellent book to recommend, a new one by Wharton professor Katy Milkman. The book is called How to Change: The Science of Getting from Where You Are to Where You Want to Be. Prof. Milkman co-directs the UPenn Behavior Change for Good Initiative, along with Angela Duckworth, the well-known author of Grit.

I won’t recite much of the book’s contents, other than to highlight a clear and compelling theme that runs throughout: intentions are not enough to lead to lasting change. I know this isn’t a groundbreaking observation. After all, every one of us has intended to establish a new good habit or break a bad one, only to be stymied by our own stubborn patterns. In fact, I wrote about this before in a previous post, Quitter’s Day.

Changing, as people, requires the right environment, practices, connections with others. Prof. Milkman does an expert job surveying the current best science on sustainable change and lays it out in an exceptionally clear and useful way. (She also uses an approach and structure that I wish most nonfiction books used.)

I now consider How to Change required reading for anyone who wants to help people. I can't wait to put it to work.


Things to Read

Globalization and the Expanding Moral Circle

A decade old, but new to me. The more globalized the country, the more likely people are to expand their circle of care.

Individualism Predicts More Generosity, not Less

Research results and a NYT Op-Ed from Abigail Marsh, my podcast guest from How to Help ep.2 - The Neuroscience of Altruism.

Cynicism ≠ Intelligence

Another study, this one showing that while cynical people are generally viewed as being more intelligent, they actually score lower on cognitive tests.


Impact Highlight

The strongest predictor for graduating high school is regular attendance. While this seems obvious, absenteeism persists because students lack the support they need to keep showing up.

Kinvolved engages entire communities in reducing school absenteeism by using a smartphone app, text messaging, and human connections to get kids attending school consistently. Their software and services have been shown to increase graduation rates by 11%, and the positive effects are especially pronounced among English Language Learners. Read more about the impact in their 2020 Impact Report.

Promotional Stuff

Are you as creative as you want to be?

Only 1/3 of adults consider themselves to be "very" creative. This is a tragedy! Everyone is creative in some way or another. I'm not an artist, but I've learned I can see new products, programs, or ventures before they exist. There's a way you're especially creative, too.

But creativity is a skill that needs nurturing. In this week's episode of the How to Help Podcast, you'll learn how to expand and explore your creativity and our guide will be Andrew Maxfield—composer, entrepreneur, and idea factory. He's the most deliberately creative person I know and an excellent teacher. Give it a listen!

How to Help Podcast • Creativity • Andrew Maxfield

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